Thursday, August 7, 2008

The Dark Angel

I am at the roof top of the hospital, feeling the cool breeze, watching the busy city. The bright neons lighting everywhere, the sky scrappers filling the whole city, cars non-stop moving, everything seems to be so alive, except me.

"I'm sorry, Miss Belle. I have to tell you it's a bad news. You have got a tumour on your brain. A big one. And I'm afraid that you can't live more than 6 months." The doctor's dianogsis when I first admitted to the hospital three months ago due to sudden faint kept repeating in my head.

Why me? This is my 1st reaction. That's me. This is how i accepted everything after months.

With no relatives and closed friends, i can only rely on my boyfriend, Evan. I am so pleasant that he didn't walk away from me when he knew this. In fact, he's the one to make me felt more better. I am a burden for him.

Tomorrow afternoon, i am going to lay on the operation bed, the first and last operation which will determine my life. "The success percentage of this operation is 50% and you have to decide whether to take a bet or not." It was Evan who make the decision for me of the operation. I was very inconfident. Not a bit at all. Nevertheless, the operation will consume a large sum of money which may use up all of Evan's saving. I am very thankful for what he had done for me for the past few months and i think i shouldn't grave more to him which this operation doesn't fully guarantee a live for me.

I have a notion. I wanted to end my life faster so that Evan can get out of me and lead a new life. I stand on the edge of the building, looking at the tiny cars moving like little ants below me, I spread my hands wide, close my eyes, the chilling wind makes my mind blank. I imagine myself falling down from the building, a step nearer to heaven. Just as when I wanted to take a step ahead, a voice strikes me. "Wow, it's so windy here! hmm... how can i not notice here until now?"

I quickly look to the direction of the voice. A pale skinny boy with the age almost same as me, wearing the same patient robe as me, is sitting on the edge of the building too. Despite his weak look, his wide smile adorns his appearance.

"Who are you? When do you come here?" I asked in surprise because I didn't notice his entrance.

"Annabelle Kingsman. You don't remember me?" I can see a swipe of disappointment on his face.

"You know me? Do I know you?" I recall back my memories but none of his character comes out.

"Aizs, i should have know you forgot about me. I'm Jared O'Connell. We were classmates during high school and you are the one who gave me a helping hand when i was bullied by few idiots." He's hoping for my reaction.

Slides of memories run through my head. I knew him! I was a prefect in high school and was so angry to see a few big bullies wanted to take advantage of Jared. Jared was a skinny boy since small. He was everytime absent from school due to his illness.

"Hey, it's such a coincident to see you here." I smile. "It's so dangerous for you to sit there, Jared!" I shout at him.

"It makes no difference for you to stand there too." His smile is so warm until i can feel it in my heart. My smile fade when he said that. I am so frustrated and so upset on everything happened. I walk to his side and sit beside him.

"My dear friend," he look away from me "don't give up so easily. What i failed to do, you can make it. You are the toughest and bravest girl i have encountered. You will go through all these." He turn to me and his hand touch my face. I can see his sadness in his eye and can feel the coldness of his hand. I hug him and tears flow down on my cheek.

"Come, let's go back inside. It's cold here and you can't take it." Suddenly I feel so relieve and urge him to go back into the building. I knew I have to go to the operation tomorrow. I have to fight for the chance to live.

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One month later...

"Hey Jared, I'm fully recovered already. Yesterday Evan proposed to me and i accepted him" I smile. "Our wedding will be on this year end!"

Holding a bouquet of white daisies, I stand in front of Jared's grave. I can feel his portrait on the graveboard smiling back to me, congratulate my succession on the operation one month ago.

After my operation, only I realised that Jared died on his operation the afternoon before we talked that night, and only that time I knew why his body was so cold that night. I am so thankful that he rescued me from ending my life. I am so grateful that he helped me and confidented me. I appreciated his appearance that night.

"Jared, thank you. Thanks a lot! What you failed to do, I did it!" I thanked him before I left. I hope he will rest in peace.

p/s: the story is inspired by a daily nespaper ;)

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